Wanna know what I think About Valentine’s Day?

Posted on February 15, 2011


Now that all the hubbub over Valentine’s Day has died down, I actually feel like sharing my thoughts.  Yesterday I was seeing what looked like this epic battle of happy vs surly-puss.  Some of my friends were excited about a day of celebrating their friends, partners and things they loved.  I saw people walking around town with bunches of flowers and treats.  One guy was walking home with a bunch of flowers and a 6 pack of beer.  (That was cute.)  And then there was the other camp.  Some felt they celebrated love every day so there was no need to have one day dedicated for such a thing.  Others were kind of bitter because they weren’t in a relationship or they felt that the day brought expectations of them.

Well, you know what I think?  I’ll tell you.  It’s in the chapter of my book called “Valentines Day.”  Here’s an excerpt:


Some people take a negative point of view about this holiday.  They think it means you have to buy a box of candy, some flowers, and take your partner out to dinner.  That’s what Hallmark, florists, and restaurant owners would have you believe but, since when do you listen to any of those guys?  I don’t.  Valentine’s Day is about celebrating love.  It’s about surrounding yourself with things you love to eat, love to look at, love to touch, the people you love, music you love to hear.  LOVE.  If you have a girlfriend on Valentine’s Day, be thankful.  It’s nice to have a girlfriend.  Do something nice.  If you don’t have a lot of money, pick her some flowers out of the ground, make her a silly card, cook dinner, light candles, rub her feet.  Just do something.  Create some kind of special evening.  It doesn’t have to be overboard. It just has to be special. And it will be special if you are sincere and put a little thought in to it.  If you find yourself at a complete loss, now would be a good time to hit up one of your female friends for the woman’s point of view.

If you and your partner are well matched, you will both enjoy similar things, so doing something nice should not be a hardship.  Valentine’s Day is an opportunity to make your partner feel special and appreciated.  Like I said before, When Mamma’s Happy, Everybody’s Happy. The deed is it’s own reward.  Another reason Valentine’s Day is a super-charged opportunity is because we’ve all had disappointing ones.  By making an effort to do something special, you will be just the opposite of all those guys who’ve ever disappointed her.  You will be lasered in her memory as the guy who gave her the best Valentine’s Day ever.  And she’ll also brag about you to all her girlfriends.  So please, take this advice.  Do something nice for Valentine’s Day.  And don’t act cranky about it.  I let a guy I was going out with read a rough draft of this book, and even after that, it damn near killed him to do something for me for Valentine’s Day.  On top of that, this was someone who was super on every other day of the year.  So even if after reading this you still don’t understand about Valentine’s Day, do it anyway.  After your first success, you will understand.  Then you will really like this day.  (And just wait and see what she does for you.)

Now, birthdays are very much like Valentine’s Day, but I still feel I have to mention them.  I mention birthdays because they’re a special occasion.  Special occasions as you know are a time to take a break from your personal monotony.  It’s an opportunity to step away and do something fun, so that you can revaluate things when you return to the grind.  It’s also a special moment that you share with people you appreciate.  If you are not partaking in the appreciation rituals with your love interest, she will be creating and cultivating bonds with others during these times.  These are times to fortify or slash and burn the relationship.  I had a boyfriend in college who totally cheesed out on my birthday.  That was something like 18 years ago, and I still remember.  He gave me a card and a flower with so much resentment and apathy.  He waited till the last minute as if he forgot it was my birthday or something.  So, I drove back to my home town and spent my birthday with this other guy.  We had a great time.  I still remember that, too.  And when I got back to college, I broke up with the boyfriend.



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